Monday, July 27, 2009

I Tried As Hard as I Could

The other night, I was hanging up a shirt in my closet, when I saw a dry cleaner tag stapled to the outside of a sweater I'd had cleaned over the winter. It said: "We Tried as Hard as We Could."

This message was clearly intended to pre-empt a customer trapsing angrily back over the the cleaner's, complaining that a stain had not been removed properly, or that a zipper was still apparently broken, etc. It worked with me, since I had no intention of tearing open the plastic to assess whether the stain which I had forgotten about anyway was still there or not. It meant a lot to me that the person assigned the task of cleaning the sweater, came forth with an honest, if not prewritten declaration, that they had indeed tried as hard as they could. I believed them.

So, being the way I am, I got to thinking what other circumstances might lend themselves to this phrase:

To the mildly irked husband:
*I'm sorry I ate all the chocolate cake in the refrigerator, and particularly the piece that was meant for you, but I got confused for a moment and thought it was my birthday, and I tried as hard as I could to resist temptation, but to no avail.

To the perhaps somewhat impatient client...
*I did my best to edit and rewrite your 500 page manuscript overnight, including attention to spelling, grammar, syntex, style, and footnotes and references -- really, I tried as hard as I could.

To my Twitter follower named "Moon Unit..." with whom I have no apparent common denominator except for a love of goji berries and narrow ruled notebooks...
I'm flattered, but could not figure out why the follow, although I tried as hard as I could.

To the great moment in history forty years ago when man first walked on the moon...
I could not remember what I was doing at the time, but I tried as hard as I could.

To Timothy Ferriss, author of The Four Hour Work Week...
I could not finish your book, although I tried as hard as I could

To the make of the film, "Night of the Living Dead,"...
Unfortunately, I cannot ever forget this movie, although goodness knows I have tried as hard as I could.

To the Brady Bunch and their rendition of "Sunshine Day,"...
Unfortunately, I cannot forget this song, although goodness knows I have tried as hard as I could.

Anyone else inspired by life's daily messages, prompted by a dry cleaning tag, or otherwise?

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